This piece represents some of what roots me in this work and the ways that our work is rooted in the hope that everyone can access what they need to thrive. The fern growing with love at the center is from my brother’s funeral. For many years, he tried to find his path to recovery and, like so many, also encountered stigma, setbacks, and barriers along the way. The two children by the sea are my brother as a child and my own young child. They look across time to each other, so much connecting them, though they never got to meet on this earth. They both keep me rooted in working for more hopeful futures for all, as do the ancestors pictured, who inspire me with their legacies of helping others. The trees and earth elements represent both finding grounding and continuing to grow, and framing this piece are maps of neighborhoods where I’ve lived and worked, with gratitude for these communities informing my passion for health equity.

For me, this painting is indicative of life. There is fire coming out of the sky, shooting out in comets and getting swallowed up by the ocean. This represents what is hard in life, though there are also some waves of calmness in the middle.

This is a close-up of a lilac. My grandma struggles with alcohol use and her mental health. She also loves lilacs. She is a night owl and has gone out in the middle of the night to steal her neighbor’s lilacs. My grandma is someone who seeks beauty in this world. This painting seeks to reflect the beauty she was always seeking.

This painting represents what inspires me to keep doing the work I do. It shows that addiction doesn't discriminate. It also represents parts of my personal story, including being alone and experiencing childhood trauma due to others’ addictions. It includes a photo of my father, who I used to believe was the reason my life was so hard through the abandonment he caused when I was young. He has now been in recovery for 12+ years and is now living with me, reminding me of the power of recovery and that it is possible. Having children, reflecting on my own childhood as well as my love for my kids, I've learned how the words we use with our children become their inner voice and strive to show them my love in ways that break generational pain. The chains being broken show that we can find healing, and the colors in this painting represent me, all blended together, because even when generational chains get broken, we still carry all the different experiences that have shaped us and all the parts of who we are. 

The symbol on the left means warrior, and it's all connected through the tree and up to the moon. It's nighttime. It is always darkest before the light shines. Living with addiction and problem gambling, having to fight for my recovery, losing those I’ve loved along the way, that's what the warrior is all about. I have been through and seen a lot: prison, institutions, and death. That’s why I now do the work I do to help others fight for their own healing and survival.

My art represents our connection to the world around us, including the spiritual world and the natural world. It signifies some of the ways that I find self-care and inspiration while doing this work. It also shows the ways that we are all connected. Our core is our heart, where we can find and share love and light. The world, and spirit, are always holding us as we work to help others, find grounding, and foster healing.

While creating this piece, I was thinking about re-centering and finding a quiet spot, and about what helps me feel calm and peaceful. I love swimming, or even just floating. When I need a break, I like to go swimming, to be immersed in water. This helps me find my center and connect with my purpose. Water is grounding for me. This work takes its toll on each of us and I feel that is what I constantly need to be doing in this work, finding that safe space within myself where I can float freely and feel calm and replenished so that I can continue to help others.

My piece is complicated. It reflects the identities I bring to this work. I wanted to depict a hand because hands represent power. It's intentional that the palm of the hand is open, to represent compassion and care. I wanted each finger of the hand to represent different pieces of myself. I’m an immigrant from Pakistan. I’m the first in my family to go to college and graduate. I’m queer (gay specifically) and it's something that I’m incredibly proud of. The ring finger holds a mask because of all the personal health problems I’ve experienced as I’ve aged. The little red string tied around one finger is a reminder to practice self-care, with a note to myself reminding me of where I’ve been. The rainbow background represents pride, with a reminder to be proud of everywhere I’ve come from and everywhere I'm going.

This painting represents self-trust. This shows up in my work on the Helplines, represented by the laptop. I work in data, so there is no room to misinterpret. I am also someone who performs, as symbolized by the microphone, and that too takes a lot of self-trust. Self-trust is especially important to me as someone who was raised by generations of people with substance use disorders. The glasses represent seeing things for what they are and trusting myself in the process. The cup and the pill bottle represent the journey of learning about what you need for your own healing. For me, that includes medication for the chemical imbalance in my brain – and also some caffeine.

In creating this piece, I was thinking about the people I know who use substances or are in recovery from substance use and reflecting on all the beauty they have brought to my life and the world. People bring so much of themselves to their recovery work, and this piece aims to celebrate those strengths and the beautiful sense of possibility that they embody. When many people think of substance use and addiction, stigma often leads them to think of ugly things. I picked joyful colors for the background and uplifting images to counter that stigma and those limited narratives, because while the disease can be ugly, the people who live with it are not.

This piece is about how my life experience has framed the lens in which I now view the world and myself.  The black background represents my early life; the white swirl in the top left is the cycle and flow of how I got to where I am now. The figure represents me. There is symbolism with the heart: my addiction enlightened me to open my eyes and my heart, to give the love and care that I needed to myself, and to others, too.

This painting represents the journey into recovery, leaving the dark forest where I have struggled due to substance use. I am walking with my eyes closed with the blind faith that the future will be brighter if I keep finding my way forward. The ghosts represent the people I’ve lost to this disease. The black balloon I am holding also honors those I’ve lost and shows that I am always carrying them with me in my recovery.

While making this piece, I was thinking about my cousin who passed away from substance use. He loved peanut M&Ms and chocolate ice cream. In this painting, we are together, eating ice cream cones, savoring a special moment to remember. The tree represents the tree of life, and the sunset reflects the memory of those we’ve lost to substance use too soon.

I chose to paint the background the colors of the lesbian flag because that is part of my identity. At the bottom is a family tree, which shows that my father is deceased. I put a dot on the symbol representing me in my family because I am the youngest. In the top corner, I attempted to paint a fiesta flag with a music note, because my family is of Hispanic heritage and is very musical. In the middle is a flexing arm to represent strength and being tough because I have gone through challenges and trauma in the past that have shaped who I am today. There is a Lego tattooed on the arm to show that even though I can be tough, I’m still a playful kid at heart.

I chose to paint the background all purple to represent the power of the recovery community. The cloud-like images represent people of color, Black and Brown people, the communities I am part of and those that I am committed to ensuring are seen, included, and supported in this work. The rainbow represents the LGBTQAI+ community. I added the word “uplift” because the voices of those from the queer community and from communities of color are not always the ones being uplifted in recovery spaces and I am passionate about changing that.