By Val Walker
Photo Credit: Kellymlacy
No matter how busily my mind is chattering away, when I spot a blue heron flying over me, I’m suddenly quiet with wonder. I stop and behold the grace of the bird’s wide wings gliding into the wind and my day begins anew—as a beholder of wonder. My love of herons sparks my sense of awe, openness, and reverence, qualities that I’ve kept private and sacred in watery sanctuaries where herons thrive.
Two years ago, I started a book about my awe-inspiring encounters with blue herons and how these majestic birds had helped me heal from trauma and loss. But recently, gazing through my window at maple trees sparkling in a burst of sunshine after a rain shower, I had an epiphany—a moment of awe in its own right. I realized it was my sense of wonder that had kept me going strong all these years, not just those beautiful herons. It was my willingness to be amazed by the beauty of nature, of music, of real-life heroes, of many wondrous things that gave me the will to survive and move forward.
And here, precisely, is the thought that struck me: It is our ability to be wowed—not only the thing that wows us—that we can claim as a source of strength.
Neuroscience has shown us that experiences of wonder are essential to our healing and resilience. Only recently did I realize how much my lifelong capacity for wonder had been so vital to my well-being—indeed, to my survival. No one I’d known had ever validated my experiences of awe and wonder as a sign of strength, wisdom, or even maturity. When I finally recognized how essential my ability to be wowed and amazed had been to my recovery as a survivor of trauma and loss, I was eager to encourage fellow survivors to reclaim their sense of wonder.
With this discovery about the power of awe and wonder, I delved further into neuroscience research as well as poetry to explore this mysterious aspect of ourselves that allows us to open to entirely new experiences. As Dacher Keltner, author of Awe: The New Science of Everyday Wonder and How It Can Transform Your Life, describes it, “Awe is the feeling of being in the presence of something vast that transcends your current understanding of the world.”
Exciting bestselling books on awe and wonder have shown how this uplifting topic has given readers a break from the cynicism and pessimism around us, but some stubborn old myths about awe still prevail. Some of these misconceptions can mislead us into high expectations of our moments of awe and wonder that may cause us to miss the smaller, more nuanced surprises.
I would like to share two particular myths alongside two realizations about awe that have opened my eyes and made me more humble—in a good way.
Myth 1
To gain the benefits of awe and wonder, you need to have a big, powerful, profound experience. For example, you once had a powerful moment of awe at age 23 when you saw a spectacular Aurora Borealis in Alaska. But since then, you have never had that same level of awe later (in real life.) You compare your awe experiences and believe “nothing compares” or “it will never happen like that again.”
Reality
Seeking to replicate the same breathtaking awe experience might be causing you to miss out on other moments of awe. Small, brief, and frequent experiences of awe and wonder, over time, offer many benefits to our well-being. We can cultivate opportunities for awe and wonder where we welcome and appreciate the more nuanced moments that still take our breath away.
Neuroscience shows how it is the frequency of awe moments that matter, no matter how small or brief. Studies reveal how smaller daily doses of awe and wonder can provide, over time, the greatest benefits to our well-being. Taking an “awe walk” in the early morning on a regular basis can give us an opportunity to open to awe-inspiring encounters.
Myth 2
You need to be in a calm, clear state of mind to have an experience of awe.
Many of us believe that if we are upset, ruminating, worried, or overthinking, then we will not be able to have a moment of awe and wonder.
Reality
Sudden, unexpected moments often do happen to people who are struggling through grief and trauma. Surprising experiences of awe quickly switch our focus outward and out of the grip of our self-referential thinking. Ethan Kross, a psychologist at the University of Michigan states in a BBC article, “When you are in the presence of something vast and indescribable, you feel smaller, and so does your negative chatter.”
Just imagine -- something astonishing captures your attention while you are ruminating or doomscrolling through social media: Your cat jumps into your room, or a chickadee sings at your window, and you stop whatever you’re fretting about, snapping out of your thoughts. Somehow, a whole day’s worth of worry stops, as if you were “saved by the bell” with a moment of awe. Even in a matter of seconds, you’re suddenly grateful that there is a wide, wondrous world outside of you to behold.
Creating More Awe in Our Lives
Creating the time and space for cultivating awe and wonder can become a spiritual practice, or at least a daily ritual of mindful living. For survivors of trauma and loss, we might turn to awe-inspiring poets, artists, and musicians who shared their moments of awe with the world.
If there is one survivor of trauma and loss who transformed her life through awe and wonder, I would choose the poet Mary Oliver as my shining example. Her wonder-filled poems have been a lifeline for me and thousands of survivors of trauma and grief. She boldly welcomes awe with a wide, open heart as she marvels at the natural world around her.
Mary Oliver proclaims in her poem, “The Ponds”:
“Still, what I want in my life is to be willing to be dazzled.”
I believe we can find strength through awe and wonder by being open and “willing to be dazzled” every day.
About the Author
Val Walker is a contributing blogger for Psychology Today and the author of 400 Friends and No One to Call, released in 2020 with Central Recovery Press. Her first book, The Art of Comforting (Penguin/Random House, 2010), won the Nautilus Book award and was recommended by the Boston Public Health Commission as a guide for families impacted by the Boston Marathon Bombing. Val received her MS in rehabilitation counseling from Virginia Commonwealth University and is a rehabilitation consultant, speaker, and educator. Her articles and Q&As have appeared in AARP, Caregiver Space, Babyboomer.com, Caregiver Solutions, Time, Good Housekeeping, Coping with Cancer, Boston Globe Magazine, Belief Net, Marie Claire, and Sweety High. Keep up with Val at www.ValWalkerAuthor.com
You can also learn more about the Healing Through Wonder project through their YouTube channel, The Sun Will Rise Foundation, and Support After a Death by Overdose (SADOD) project.
